Please help me feel happy again after going through bad patch?

u re suffering of low self esteem and he has nothing to do with it. if he were more of a man he would tell u to shut the f''k up or go take your business elsewhere. u re wallowing in self pity and making his and yours life a living hell. probably u get smth out of it - maybe it helps u to forget some deeper problems, maybe it helps u to overcome anxiety and distract your mind - i do not know. i know there re medications from anxiety and for self esteem u can go to gym and improve your looks. honestly, how does he live with u still? no wonder he started an affair. he will start another one if u don't stop